Wedding Wednesday:Dad on the Big Day
Dads are amazing. Your dad is probably your biggest fan (next to mom). After all, he loved you first. And when you told him you were getting married, he felt so many things all at once. That can be a lot for dad.
Dad may not be involved in all the planning. He may not offer his opinion on color schemes and floral bouquets. Maybe he will! But for a lot of dads, it isn’t their thing. He’ll sit quietly in the background, smile when you get excited about a little detail, and think back on the times he spent with you when you were still a kid.
Your fiance might have talked to your dad before popping the question! That was probably another one of those Big Feelings moments. But, if he knows how much you’re in love, he said yes - maybe after a stern talkin’ to.
If you’re the bride, dad gets to do a lot of special things on your wedding day, and he’ll cherish each and every one, preparing for them with excitement and nervous jitters. He’ll check his tie in the mirror, and when he does he’ll take a few deep breaths.
Though he probably won’t get to be a big part of the getting ready, he’ll get that special first look. Make sure you get this on camera: the moment his baby steps into view in a wedding dress, with her hair all done up. He’s been holding back tears for a while now, and he may not be able to hide it anymore.
He gets to walk you down the aisle (traditionally) and he’ll probably check in with you one last time.
“Are you sure you want to do this? Cause if not, my truck is running behind the church and we can make a run for it.”
He’ll hold tight to your hand as he leads you on that long walk toward the rest of your life. When he gives you away, he may hesitate just a little. But then, he’ll kiss your cheek and go join your mom to watch you say “I Do!”
He’ll pretend he doesn’t really want to do it, but inside he’ll be jumping for joy to join you on the dance floor for that special dance - maybe to the lullaby he sang for you as a baby, or the classic rock jam you both have always loved.
Dad will be there all night, even though by this point he is worn out. He’ll chat with all of your guests and shake hands with your new spouse’s cousines. Maybe he’ll give a toast to your future (he’ll definitely include a few dad jokes) and he’ll slow dance with your mom as they remember the night they tied the knot.
Finally, when the DJ has been paid and the parking lot cleared, he’ll go home. He’ll loosen his tie, and he might feel a little lost for a moment. He’ll sit down someplace and pull out a photo album, or pick up that drawing you made for him in grade school that he keeps on his bedside table. Maybe he’ll smile, maybe he’ll cry for a second. He will probably call you in about an hour just to check in.
Make sure dad knows how much you love him on your big day. Here are a few ways to celebrate him beyond the traditional first looks and daddy-daughter dances:
Let dad provide your something borrowed: wrap your bridal bouquet in one of his favorite neck ties, or sew a piece of one of his old flannels into the lining of your dress.
Photos: Include fun, heartwarming childhood snapshots of you with your dad in your wedding photo display.
Prayer or Pre-Dinner Toast: Let dad be the one to say grace over the meal if your family observes religious traditions. Of not, your dad can kick off the meal with a fun toast and an invitation for your guests to dig in.
Ask him to officiate: These days, it is easy to get the necessary licensing to join two people in matrimony. Your dad will beam with joy when he stands before you and your fiance and literally performs your wedding ceremony.
A Special Gift: Give your dad something to hold on to throughout your wedding day and after. Make it personal, maybe including a favorite song lyric or a sentimental memory from childhood.
